Stop brushing
mental health issues under the carpet
It is said about pigeons that when they see the cat,
despite using their wings to fly away, they close their eyes and assume that
the cat does not exist. They stay in that folly until they are killed by the
cat. I think it’s not about pigeons only, we also behave similarly. We face the
problems existing physically, we visit a doctor when our body feels sick, we go
to shopping mart when we are out of grocery, we go to fuel stations to refill
our vehicles and go to banks and ATMs to withdraw money, we do work to earn for
our physical needs and expensed, But….
We exactly behave like pigeons when it comes to mental
well-being. Just because we can’t see the cat never means it’s never going to
kill us and still, we continue to brush our mental issues under the carpet and
assuring ourselves cat is not here until this cat kills us. For us, this cat is
depression, this cat is anxiety, and this cat is hopelessness and various other
forms of mental illness as we name them.
Why does this even happen that people start ignoring their
mental health issues? It’s mainly because of the taboos that exist in our
society, the stigmas, the fear of social exclusiveness, the judgmental
attitudes one faces and labels that people put on them when someone decides to
open.
An already broken soul starts finding it easier to stay
quiet and die inside rather than speaking up about their issues and let masses
get busy in judging him. It is so unfortunate to live in a society where we are
not ready to understand mental health issues are a real problem and not
something fantasized. Neither we want to acknowledge that every flu is not
caused by COVID-19, every headache is not due to a brain tumor and so
definitely every person facing depression is not insane until we make him by
other judgmental attitudes and wrong choice of words.
At every single level, we see people facing traumas; many
of those never share their situations with anyone. Let’s understand clearly
that anyone could be a victim, be it a 10-year-old student shy enough to speak
in class and being scolded for it, 14 years old who is not able to cope with
the stress coming from school, a 16-year old girl who is bullied for her color
and weight, a 17-year teenage girl old being harassed at school and not able to
share it because her family will count it as her mistake or will not support
her, an 18-year old guy ready to enter university but not given the choice to
choose his subjects, a 22-year old fresh graduate who is not able to get a job
that matches the expectations of his family, a person trying to handle
heartbreak or someone an abusive toxic marriage, someone not being able to have
children or not being able to earn enough for his/ her family, anyone could be
a victim. Mental health issues do not discriminate ever, they affect people
boundaries of gender, race, color, creed or nation.
This is the time we need to normalize discussions about
mental health. We need to break stereotypes so one could be comfortable in
mentioning that they are facing mental issues, anxiety, depression, burn out
like the way we indicate that we are having flu or even cancer. Our nervous
system is a part of our body and like any part of our body, our brain can get
sick too. Just like our legs get tired after excessive walking, our mind can
get exhausted too after excessive pressure of handling rough situations. If we
don’t stigmatize anyone for getting tired after excessive work-out, why we do
label ourselves or other as lunatic, insane, crazy, oversensitive when they are
not performing well mentally. We don’t care until something unforgivable
happens.
The key for damage control at our own end is accepting the
fact that we are having problems and we need support, the most important thing
we need is to SPEAK UP. Speak up against abuse before our limits for tolerance
ends, about traumas, heartbreak, things damaging your peace, speak up before we
give up our ability to think, process and speak.
We must stop looking down upon our problems and start
taking them seriously when they are damaging our mental health. Ever wonder
what it should be for others then? Telling them that they are being dramatic or
over-thinker, or they have the habit of crying or complaining, or they are good
for nothing? Definitely, a big NO. All we need to do is to practice active
listening, patience and empathy. Instead of telling ourselves and others to
tolerate or handle disturbing, harsh or abusive behaviors and bear with the
pressures until life inside us ends; or we lose more of our loved ones when
they deliberately end their lives as they are tired of ignoring their issues
just to match the pace of society.
We never know our five minutes spent patiently with
someone could save them from any wrong decision. For a person losing hope, we
never know one simple sentence could give him courage to fight or deprive them
of left-over hope. My friend told me about a friend of a friend who wrote on
his suicide note, if someone would ask me why I am killing myself, I will not
commit suicide. It was enough for me to understand the importance of active
listening.
Life is never a bed of roses, Let’s try being a little bit
sensitive and responsible with our words and actions.
Author: Rtr. Sajida Khalid
Rotaract Club of Karachi Innovators
RID: 3271
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